Parenting Stress & Strategies

By Shelley Galasso Bonanno, MA, LLP

Parenting can be one of the most rewarding experiences, but also one of the most stressful. The demands can feel overwhelming. Understanding how to manage parenting stress is essential to both your and your family’s well-being. Here are some strategies to help.

Understand Your Feelings and Build Your Support

The first step in managing any form of stress is to recognize and acknowledge your feelings. It’s normal to feel overwhelmed, frustrated, or anxious at times as a parent. Instead of suppressing these emotions, take time to reflect on what’s causing your stress. Is it a particular situation, such as a child’s behavior or work-life balance? Understanding the root of your feelings can help you address them more effectively.

Building a support system is crucial. No one can do it all alone. Connect with other parents, family members or friends who understand  what  you’re  going  through. Sharing  experiences  and  discussing challenges can provide perspective and relief. Whether it’s lunch with a friend or joining a  parenting  group,  having  a  support network can alleviate feelings of isolation and help us feel connected.

Set Realistic Expectations and Focus on Positive Parenting Techniques

Learn  about  child  development  and understand reasonable expectations for your child for their developmental stage. For example, a toddler cannot be expected to

perform self-care without assistance, while a pre-teen may just require gentle reminders – if any. Having unrealistic goals in parenting can lead to ongoing feelings of frustration for both parents and children. Set achievable expectations for yourself and your children.

While it is easy to focus on what our children are  doing  wrong,  making  a  conscious effort to focus on what your children are doing right is more difficult. But it is worth it. Implementing positive parenting techniques can reduce stress and enhance your  relationship  with  your  children. Techniques such as active listening, positive reinforcement  and  consistent  discipline can  create  a  more  harmonious  home environment.

Embrace Flexibility While Practicing Time Management

While schedules are effective, parenting is full of surprises, and flexibility is key. Learning to adapt and go with the flow can reduce frustration for both you and your children. Embrace the chaos and find joy in the unpredictable nature of parenting. Adding good time management is crucial. Create a family schedule that includes time for work, chores, and fun activities. Prioritize tasks and delegate responsibilities. Teaching your children to take on age-appropriate chores not only eases your workload but also fosters  independence  and  responsibility. Studies reveal children who are assigned chores experience increased self-esteem and responsibility, feeling more equipped to deal with frustration and adversity.

Practice Self-Care and Don’t Be Afraid to Ask For Help

As a parent, it’s easy to put your needs last, feeling that this is benefiting your children, but self-care is vital for managing stress. Make time for activities that rejuvenate you, whether it’s exercising, reading, or enjoying a hobby. Even small breaks, like taking a walk or practicing mindfulness, can significantly reduce stress levels. If you feel parenting stress is becoming overwhelming and/or unmanageable, consider seeking professional help. Licensed mental health professionals can help provide strategies to cope with stress and offer a safe space to discuss your feelings. Asking for help from an expert in parenting challenges can be a significant step toward self care and regaining balance in your life.

A lifelong resident of Macomb County,  Shelley  Galasso Bonanno is a practicing limited licensed psychologist who earned her master’s degree from Wayne State University in 1987. She has a breadth of experience in working with adults, children, families, and couples.

In addition to working in private practice, Ms. Bonanno performs consultative services for State and forensic agencies. She performs custody and parenting time evaluations and is a court approved mediator. Her writings have appeared in various online and print publications. An advocate for mental health, you can follow Ms. Bonanno on X (Twitter) @shelleybonanno.